If there are things I'm not comfortable with, things I object to, as a general rule I don't have to put up with them. I have the resources to reject them and find a better alternative. A better job, a better place to live, a better holiday, better food, and so forth.
Those at the bottom of the heap don't usually have that option. They have to put up with things - often totally degrading and soul-destroying things - because they don't have the means to find something more acceptable.
I was reminded of this difference while reading James Bloodworth's book, "Hired", in which he takes on various low-paid, menial, oppressive jobs and talks to the people who do them. So many of them are simply stuck in those jobs because they have little choice.
They don't have the skills or determination or money to find something more dignified. They have to do anything that will pay the rent or the mortgage and feed their families. They have to put up with ruthless employers and impossible working conditions and take whatever is thrown at them.
I've been privileged enough to avoid such misery. I had the money to be out of work for months without worrying about paying the bills. So if I didn't like a job, I could just walk out. I had the skills to talk myself into decent jobs with decent salaries. And I had several unexpected windfalls from my mum. It's easy to take all these personal advantages for granted and forget the less fortunate.
I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth, but I've certainly had my share of good luck.
I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth and was welcomed by the purchase of a new car to drive me home from the maternity home. I was indeed privileged till my early teens when things went wrong and by the time I was 16 I had to get out and make my way in the wicked world out there. I have seen both ends of the economic spectrum though not quite the super rich and am grateful for what I have been able to achieve despite the dip in fortunes in my teens to say mid twenties. I have often mentioned in my blog posts that I was fortunate that many good things happened despite me as I was just in the right place at the right time.
ReplyDeleteNow in my twilight years, I can look back and wonder that I was not forced to stick to something that I did not like many others that I know who had to. There were others who could not take the grind and escaped with alcohol or drugs and paid the price.
Such experiences and observations make me believe in the theory of Karma.
On another blogger's recommendation I watched "I, Daniel Blake", last night and it really drove home how terrible some people's lives are yet again.
ReplyDeleteI don't view myself as well off by any means but every day I am grateful that the end of my life sees me in comfort and reasonably stress free.
I know what it is to be scrambling, taking in lodgers, taking on, one time, 3 jobs and exhausted and diminished and demeaned.
So once outside the other side there is lots of gratitude and a huge desire to help those less fortunate which I am trying to do right now with senior impoverished women.
XO
WWW
I've lived my entire adult life no more than a month or two's income away from disaster. In retrospect, my parents' generation were the first who did not, who felt relatively secure. Their parents worked hard for a living and keeping the family intact, including boarders. The generation before worked equally hard to keep bread on table and a roof overhead. Now to the current generation, where "education" is no longer the sure path. It's a hard, hard world these days. I wonder how much of the future I will experience.
ReplyDeleteRamana: You seem to have had a lot of good luck as well, after the bad patch in your early teens. One thing James Bloodworth notes in his book is that a lot of the people he came across had resorted to alcohol or drugs to escape their oppressive existence.
ReplyDeletewww: "I Daniel Blake" is a great film. It depicts vividly the impossible situations that so many people have to cope with on a daily basis. As you say, they end up exhausted and diminished and demeaned. You're lucky that unlike some your later life is comfortable and fairly stress-free.
ReplyDeleteJoanne: I gather an alarmingly high number of people are only a month or two's wages away from catastrophe, and have no savings to tide them over in an emergency. You're right, education used to be the key to improving your life and achieving social mobility but nowadays getting on is much trickier. We're going back to the days when the only way to get on was to be born into the right family - one with masses of money and plenty of influential connections.
ReplyDeleteHere in the U.S. community colleges offer a way to get two years of college and an associates degree in a variety of practical fields. I have relatives who are doing/have done that. My niece is doing it after a divorce and a grandnephew is doing it while working.
ReplyDeleteMy father hated his job and thought being an adult sucked. He resorted to alcohol and hated being addicted to it, but he had a lot of joyful moments under the influence. My goal in getting an education was to avoid being stuck in a job that made me bonkers, and my overriding goal was to learn to have as much joy as he sometimes had without needing alcohol or other drugs. It was a lot of work but it paid off.
I wonder how I would fare if I were to be starting off in today's world with only my education as an advantage....not well, I suspect.
ReplyDeleteI have been rich and I have been poor but never so poor that I had to take a demeaning job. There were many years when we didn't have emergency savings, though. We are lucky that we were able to get beyond that point mostly thanks to the GI bill for Dave's education and zero down VA loans to buy a house. I wouldn't want to have Dave take that route with today's military situation--Viet Nam was not nearly as bad a Afghanistan.
ReplyDeleteJean: I'm astonished by how many people need to resort to alcohol and drugs simply to make their everyday life bearable. What an indictment of successive governments that people's lives are so miserable and hopeless.
ReplyDeleteHelen: Me too. Considering I don't even have a degree, I've managed to land some very interesting jobs over the years. But how would I fare now if I were applying for the same jobs?
Unfortunately, even a college degree no longer equates with escaping a dead end, soul crushing job. As my son says, you just need to find a job that is 'mildly tolerable.'
ReplyDeleteLinda: The GI bill helped many people to better themselves. I'd never heard of zero-down VA loans; we don't have anything like that in the UK and we should have. Veterans here are treated very badly in all sorts of ways, especially those with serious mental health issues who are mostly just left to rot.
ReplyDeleteBijoux: Same in the UK. To get a decent, well-paying job with prospects I think two degrees are now often the absolute minimum requirement. The number of graduates working as baristas or wait staff must be huge.
ReplyDeleteif one believes in luck and timing... it's incredible how it factors in.
ReplyDeleteBob owned his own company and was doing just fine. we finally were able to take a vacation. his insurance man called the Friday before we were to leave and said "we need to talk about adding a catastrophic illness clause to your policy." Bob agreed but said we were just about to leave and that he'd get with him as soon as we returned. as you might or might not know... we never left town. on that Friday he stopped by Dr Lewis's office to get a med for his serious heartburn. the doc thought his neck looked swollen and ordered immediate xrays. they rushed everything. (today I imagine that wouldn't happen.) it seems to take weeks just to get a report back of any kind.
and it resulted in major cancer of the esophagus surgery the following week.
and no insurance for the catastrophe that is cancer. we went through savings first and then his business and our home eventually. nothing. medical bills that were unbelievably astronomical. we even borrowed against life insurance. I still live pretty much from paycheck to paycheck. I guess I didn't learn the big C lesson. I did learn life skills very quickly just to survive. and I feel the young people today don't have the coping skills it might take if there is no one to fall back on as a safety net. (the marine was in college and working two jobs just raising his own little family!) as one boss told me once when I had asked for a small raise... "well Tammy. I'm sorry. but it's rough all over!" LOL! it certainly was/IS. contentment is something I relearn every year. now just staying healthy is key for me! and I consider myself fortunate!
The thing is that these 'demeaning' jobs HAVE to be done. And people should be given more money and kudos to do them.
ReplyDeleteAs regards to my own circumstances - swings and roundabouts!
Sx
Tammy: That's a horrifying story. I've heard similar stories about US healthcare many times. Catastrophic illness causing massive medical bills and previously well-off people reduced to penury and even sleeping on the streets. I'm very glad I have the NHS, however overloaded and underfunded it now is.
ReplyDeleteAs you say, you had to learn some coping skills very quickly, and how many young people today have those skills?
Ms Scarlet: Absolutely, the menial and humdrum jobs have to be done, and they should be as enjoyable and rewarding as possible for those forced to take them. Relaxed working conditions, proper pay rates, sickness and holiday pay etc.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you on your feelings about how the advantages of being well off translate into opportunities. The discouragement of being at the bottom with no real good way to move upward financially IS soul draining - almost being yet another impediment to financial advancement. I took for granted having those little things that got me started - that gave me a leg up that others did not have.
ReplyDeleteMarie: I landed a very well paid job as soon as I left school because I'd had a good education. I doubt if I'd find it so easy if I was leaving school this year.
ReplyDeleteOur US veterans with mental health issues are also treated horribly. PTSD is finally getting some recognition but not yet enough from my point of view. Plus, some Viet Nam war-induced conditions are just now getting recognized. My oldest brother's Lupus is a result of Agent Orange but that was only recognized a couple of years ago. The VA health system is broken so I'm glad my Dave is not dependent on it.
ReplyDeleteEntirely true. And that sounds like an interesting book. Occasionally I buy books that remind me not to whinge when I feel down, I know that really I am incredibly lucky. And to think that the people in those jobs are probably living the life of Riley compared with people in third world countries who try to survive by picking rubbish or begging.
ReplyDeleteLinda: Governments are happy enough to send people to fight wars for them, but when they return home with physical and psychological injuries, the politicians look the other way and pretend it's not their problem.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about your brother's Lupus. Agent Orange was a diabolical invention.
Jenny: Indeed, there are people far worse off than you or I or even the poorest Britons. Having to survive by picking through rubbish, often extremely toxic rubbish like computer parts, is a horrible fate.
ReplyDeleteI do feel for school leavers these days as the employment climate has certainly changed. I went to an exclusive girl's boarding school, then on to university. When I graduated in the late 1970s, I did my articles then joined a prestigious law firm. The fact that I went to "the right school" was important in those days - it was a passport to a safe, secure middle class life.
ReplyDeleteMy children on the other hand could not rely on "the old school tie" to ensure any kind of advantage, though they got an excellent education which has helped steer them into good jobs, but they get promoted on merit rather than who they know.
I also wanted to say that the book "Hired" sounds something like "Nickel and Dimed" by Barbara Ehrenreich. I must check it out just for comparison.
People don't have to turn to drugs and alcohol if they have lives of drudgery and feel locked-in with no way out. I think some cope by developing other sorts of distractions/interests and some turn to religion Observing as a child and experiencing a change in family financial standing certainly helped me formulate how I wanted to direct my life, so I made an effort to do just that, noting all the different types of labor I did when young I soon determined I didn't want to be stuck doing them as an adult, but could and would if I had to. A parental model of positive attitude, adaption to circumstances probably was a helpful factor, too.
ReplyDeleteWe have to assess the times in which we live, develop a variety of skills, learn from whatever job we're able to get, be flexible and open to alternative career/work directions. Attitudes need to be nourished toward the excitement of learning with education (formal and/or self-educating) viewed as a lifelong activity that can be pleasurable -- can help coping with any drudgery feelings, too. Being computer/digital literate is probably one necessary given ability now. There are no easy simple answers given today's world and unknowns.
It's good to appreciate one's good fortune. Too often those who have it, confuse it with merit, and presume that those who do not, do not deserve it.
ReplyDeleteblackwatertown: The wealthy invariably say they've made their fortunes through smart thinking and hard work. Of course they know that in reality most of their money was inherited or the result of large-scale tax avoidance.
ReplyDeleteJoared: I agree, teaching your child adaptability is important. Life is changing so fast that anyone stuck in old habits and attitudes will soon be left behind and unable to make a decent future for themselves. And yes, continuing to educate yourself and pick up new skills and knowledge is an essential part of that adaptability.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely. It is definitely not a level playing field.
ReplyDeleteHeavens, when you talk of having a couple of months pay to fall back on, that would be something like $8000 for a low paid Australian. Most of those low paid workers would have much, much less than that in reserve.
ReplyDeleteWhat do you do with your privilege, Nick?