I see humility as the opposite of pride - which on the contrary is the bigging up of your own or other people's achievements as if they're fantastic.*
Personally I'm more prone to humility than pride. I'm quite self-effacing and I don't see myself as in any way exceptional. I'm just a very ordinary person doing very ordinary things.
If anyone suggests I'm special I promptly deny being any such thing. I'm just a grain of sand on the banks of the Ganges, as the Buddha supposedly put it.
I find it rather odd that people take pride in other people's achievements (especially their children), as if they themselves have achieved whatever it is. They seem to be looking for some sort of reflected glory.
But I wouldn't describe myself as humble, which unfortunately has come to mean grovelling and arse-licking rather than just being ordinary. I prefer to say I'm modest or unassuming.
Many public figures develop a view of themselves as extra-special because of all the attention paid to them by the media and by the general public. They mistake attention for genuine appreciation and respect.
Politicians in particular strut around as if they're the bee's knees and as if the world revolves around them. I hate to break it to them, but they're just temporary public servants who might be replaced at any moment.
* Isn't pride a form of boasting?
Ah, you take pride in your humility!!
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Ms Scarlet: Witty but not quite true! Humility is simply what I aim for. I don't take any pride in it.
DeleteMs Scarlet: Could you be planning a return to blogland?
DeleteI believe it's for others to assign the word humility to us, not ourselves, as it can be an oxymoron, no? Or fishing for the denials?
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WWW
www: But nobody has ever assigned it to me. I'm not fishing for denials but you're free to issue some!
DeleteAnonymous Fly. I'm not humble...there are too many people keen to put one in one's place...but I know I'm not special, either. I never had this on my school reports but often think that I 'could have done better'.
ReplyDeleteFly: I'm ready to respond if someone tries to put me in my place. As for school reports, mine tended to say something like "He's very intelligent, if he would only use his intelligence."
DeleteOf course you are special. As am I. As are your commentators. As is everyone.
ReplyDeleteWhy? Because there will only ever be one Nick, one Ursula, one WWW, one Ms Scarlet (thanks for the laugh the two latter ones). The one. Never to be repeated. If there is one thing I am totally in awe of - not least my son's existence - it's that any of us is born at all. Think of the chances that THAT sperm met THAT egg in order to make YOU. If that doesn't make one "special" I don't know what does.
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Ursula: I see what you mean but I'm not convinced that I'm special. I'm just another human being trudging through life, like thousands of others. But like you I'm certainly in awe of how new human beings come about.
DeleteI'm so certain I am not special that I am surprised when people I have not seen for awhile recognize me.
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Linda: People recognise me quite easily as I'm tall and thin!
DeleteThe easiest way through life is to carry on.
ReplyDeleteJoanne: Indeed, I couldn't agree more. Just keep on trucking!
DeleteI find it a bit depressing to hear that people don’t think they are special. As Ursula said, we are all unique.
ReplyDeleteBijoux: Well, people might find me interesting or likeable or charming, but special? It's not a word I've ever applied to myself.
DeleteNick.may be you are not special but you are of sure unique and as you may know all grains of sand are different.so in some way you are special.For me special means to have your personnality, your way of smiling or laughing , your way of respecting people and your way to live your life. As you know English is not my mothertongue , so my words are not always exactly what I try to express but I think you understand ....because you are special.
ReplyDeleteHannah (.I feel not special but sometimes a bit apart).
Hannah: The things you mention there just seem to amount to my personality. I don't see them as special in any way. Maybe you could use the word special if I was a brilliant pianist or artist or scientist, but I'm none of those! I know the feeling of being a bit apart - I've never been very conventional or predictable.
DeleteNick,that's the best thing not to be like others but just to be the person who you are.
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Hannah: I do my best to be the person I am and not what others want me to be.
DeleteBeatrice says "An interesting topic, Nick, and one which I thought about reading it and the comments of others. While my parents and I did not always get along. Their choice of high school (an older one vs. a newer, closer one) did not leave me happy as I knew in later years. That said, I know they were doing what they felt was in my best interests as the selected school was even more costly. They grew up in the US depression-era and now I realize that they taught me a lot more than I realize about saving and not overspending. They are both deceased, but I owe than a belated thanks."
ReplyDeleteBeatrice: My parents may have disappointed me in some ways but in other ways, like you, they had a good influence on me. They taught me "moderation in all things" so I never became a drink or drugs addict or a wild extremist. And I picked up my father's quirky sense of humour.
DeleteI agree. I'm not a prideful person. Seems like all these "Influencers" sure do see themselves as something special these days though.
ReplyDeleteMary: Indeed, these influencers really fancy themselves! Fortunately I don't use the platforms the influencers use so they have no effect on me.
DeleteI couldn't agree more. So many are so self absorbed. I am nothing special but it is okay.
ReplyDeletePaula: Too true, so many people are relentlessly self-absorbed and blind to other people's interests.
Deletehumble is the noun form of humility so they describe the same traits. I don't know where you get the idea that humble is arse licking.
ReplyDeleteThey say that if a person believes themselves to be humble it automatically means they are not.
Pride is ok when a person takes pride in their work, craftsmanship or whatever. It means they care and have respect for their audience. Pride is another beast altogether when it becomes a toxic kind of independence
Kylie: People often refer to humble employees, meaning low-level employees who just have to do what they're told. I was never proud of my work, I was simply pleased that I had done something well. But yes, it's toxic if it's just a kind of boasting.
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