The number of adult children living with their parents in the UK has jumped to five million, with more than half those aged 19 to 23 doing so.
Parents aren't necessarily happy about it, if they've got used to having the home for themselves. And they may be distressed that their child is finding life so difficult.
I never thought of returning to the parental home, as I'd never been close to my parents, and as my father had taken an active dislike to me. We'd have driven each other nuts in no time. In any case, I would have felt very restricted by having always to allow for my parents' attitudes and scrutiny.
Also there was no cost of living crisis at the time (the seventies in London). My year as an undergraduate was paid for by the state so I had no outstanding student loans. I lived in a rented bed sit with minimal costs for gas and electricity. I didn't need a car as public transport was excellent. My salary was more than adequate. So there was nothing to make reverting to the parental home a serious option.
So what if I'd got on famously with my parents and my financial situation was dire, would I have moved back in with them? Maybe. But I'd have to have got on with them extremely well. And how many children get on with their parents extremely well (as opposed to somehow rubbing along)? Not that many, from what I can gather.
Like you, the problem never arose...grants, decent salaries, low rents...I struggled while making my way but got by by taking students. It would not have worked returning to the parents' home. But in the place of todays' young people, what would I do? I suppose taking on a part time job as well as my own....
ReplyDeleteFly: I honestly don't know how many youngsters manage to make ends meet. It's a terrible time to be young.
DeleteIt would have been a nightmare to me, to move back home. My oldest and youngest both did, right after college. The oldest was working the night shift at a hospital and didn’t want to live alone. My youngest didn’t get a job until 4 months after graduation, then he moved to the city where his job was. And then there’s Middle Child, but that’s a unique circumstance. Fortunately, my kids and I all get along quite well.
ReplyDeleteBijoux: Did they stay with you a long time or only briefly? Are you saying that the youngest only stayed for four months? That wouldn't be too hard.
DeleteYes, he was only here for 4 months. The oldest lived here after college for about two years but we never saw her because of the night shift rotation.
DeleteBijoux: If you never saw her, I guess that wouldn't be too hard either!
Deletethecontemplativecat@blogspot.com, here. Google and Blogspot are messing with my programs. I thought about getting a divorce and go home until I could move on. It was a temporary thought. Too many young adults feel that their parents take care of them,
ReplyDeleteContemplativecat: We don't have any children so we have no personal experience of bringing up young adults. If they expect their parents to take care of them, it's about time they grew up!
DeleteI didn't wait to graduate to find my own place and job. My parents were very kind, but I could not imagine living with them, working where I grew up. I moved to a bigger city and stayed there for 30 years before moving "back home." Sadly, "home" for my kids is where they grew up and that is their home now.
ReplyDeleteI cannot imagine making my way anywhere these days. How do the youngsters do it? I guess they don't.
Joanne: Indeed, how do the youngsters do it? And they get less and less help from the government. Stringent rent controls are urgently needed.
DeleteThere was no cost of living crisis in the seventies??? Eh?? There was!!
ReplyDeleteAnd I couldn't leave home until I was 25!! And that only came about because of help from a friend.
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Ms Scarlet: Well, I guess the cost of living was less of an issue in those days, though some people (like you) would still be struggling.
DeleteIt was the backdrop to my childhood! It's why punk came about, and why Margaret Thatcher happened.
DeleteSome people - not your sort of people? You mean the working class riff-raff I suppose?
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Ms Scarlet: Sorry if I got your back up. But certainly the cost of living is much worse now - thousands of food banks, people who can't afford heating, wages that have plummeted in real terms. "Britons are set for the biggest squeeze on living standards in a century." - Business Times. By some people I don't mean the working class, I just mean people who for one reason or another have fallen on hard times. The middle classes are finding themselves in trouble as well.
DeleteThat's soooooo September 2022!!! :-)
DeleteNo, I'm not good first thing in the morning!
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Eh? What was happening in September 2022?
DeleteLiz Truss happened.
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Ms Scarlet: Indeed, that didn't do much for the economy. Though the banks also damaged the economy by jacking up interest rates.
DeleteMary says: "Rent is so high here that my daughter moved back home and lives with me now. I don't mind though, I like the company."
ReplyDeleteMary: Good that you like the company. Rents are getting higher and higher in the UK also.
DeleteI have 24 year old twins and a 26 year old living with me, one of them never moved out to start with.
ReplyDeleteRents are extortionate, they have huge student debt and house prices are usually over a million dollars.
There are many times I dislike living with them but it can be good company and they all contribute financially at a rate which is super cheap for them but helps me enormously. I just grit my teeth and try to be gracious when I'm not impressed and although I think I'm an angel, they probably grit their teeth as well
Kylie: Wow, three children living with you, that's a bit of a challenge! Good to know you all rub along okay, despite the occasional teeth-gritting. And as you say, their financial contribution helps you out.
DeleteBeatrice says: "I did live at home until my mid-30s and thankfully got along with my parents although we didn't always agree. Ironically, I moved to my own apt after my father died and while I regretted that my mother was alone, it worked out OK. I never regretted moving out and though it should have been done sooner, but perhaps I became "too comfortable" for too long.
ReplyDeleteBeatrice: Yes, I guess you became too comfortable! Glad things worked out okay when you finally moved.
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