Monday 25 April 2022

Dying for a pee

One big advantage of being a bloke is that I'm not expected to wear all those impractical, uncomfort-able clothes that women submit themselves to. I can wear clothes that don't impede me in any way, clothes I'm not desperate to remove after being in them for half an hour.

The comedian Jessica Fostekew was describing a party she attended, saying that her bunched toes were agony inside her pointed high heels and going to the loo in her spanx-lined jumpsuit was so complicated she was holding her pee in for as long as possible. Not to mention the make-up she was trying not to smear.

So why does she wear all this stuff? As a self-employed comedian, not subject to any workplace dress code, she can wear whatever she wants so why not just wear something comfortable?

If a man can be hilarious in a jacket and pants and sensible shoes, why not a woman? Is a woman's joke only amusing if  she's torturing herself and desperate for a pee? Of course not.

If a man was required to wear stilettos all day, he'd soon be ripping them off and refusing to wear them. I'm amazed so many women actually claim to enjoy having them on. Who are they kidding?

22 comments:

  1. That’s a weird thing to complain about when no one’s forcing her to wear those things. I guess she thought it was a funny bit? I feel as though society has gone the opposite direction, because I see an awful lot of people in pajamas and sweatpants when I’m out and about.

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    1. Oh good grief, the comment function has suddenly been updated - to make it more laborious. What was wrong with the old version?

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    2. Bijoux: There are plenty of sweatpants in evidence here too, but not pyjamas. Northern Ireland still retains a modicum of respectability!

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  2. I don’t think she was wearing that particular outfit for the stand up routine. I think she was dressing up for a party. She does a weight lifting routine, or something, and is quite quirky.
    I don’t think you’d catch Jo Brand wearing heels or Spanx!! And she’s reached the giddy heights of National Treasure not giving a damn about her appearance.
    Sx

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    1. Ms Scarlet: Well, even for a party, surely you'd want to be comfortable and not desperately controlling your bladder? Indeed, Jo Brand just wears exactly what she feels like wearing.

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  3. I've read that women who feel the need to wear high heels buy shoes half a size too large. I doubt that would work with spandex.

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    1. Heels half a size too large? Does that actually work?

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  4. Well that would have been me for most of my life. I did not wear stilettos but a two to three inch heel was what I usually wore. I stopped at one time and wore flats to work and acquired heel spurs. The foot doctor told me when I returned to wearing regular shoes, wear at least a 2 inch heel.

    I wore shoes with a good insole plus I was younger. But you put a wee pad in the toe portion of the shoe to cushion your foot.

    As a teacher, I always felt you should be able to wear sneakers. The dress code where I worked always required dress shoes.

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    1. Ann: Yes, why shouldn't teachers wear sneakers? How exactly would dress shoes make you a better teacher? Glad to know your heels didn't cause any long-term problems.

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  5. Indian women by and large wear very comfortable and practical clothes and seldom face the problems like you have written about. Both the Sari and the Salwar Kameez combo offer enough comfort and practicality.

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    1. Ramana: Very sensible of them. You'd think dresses would be a good choice, but even dresses are often skintight or so short you struggle to avoid showing too much.

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  6. Clarification for Ms Scarlet, who thinks I'm heel-shaming women. Of course women can wear whatever they want to. I was only commenting on Jessica Fostekew because she was complaining about "the agony of bunched toes in a pointy heel".

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  7. I stopped wearing heels a while back and have never worn shapewear of any sort. I very much value comfort! It is odd that she would subject herself to that when it isn't necessary. Frankly, I wish women would just unite and refuse.

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    1. Agent: Absolutely - just unite and refuse. But so many bogus reasons are given for wearing heels. They're sexy, they're more professional, they're elegant etc etc.

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  8. Back when I was in my 20's I could wear heels and be fine for a few hours. Now that I'm in my 50's, there's just no way. My 50 year old feet cannot keep up with that kind of nonsense. I wear makeup for me because I like it. But I wear comfortable clothes these days.

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    1. Mary: Fifty year old feet and high heels is not a good combination!

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  9. I havent worn a heel in 25 years and I've never worn jumpsuits or shapewear. Women have a vast amount of freedom in clothing so complaints receive short shrift from me.
    Having said that, I think Sydney is one of the easiest places in the world to dress, we take "casual" to a pinnacle (depth?) rarely seen elsewhere

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    1. Kylie: I've noticed that people dress pretty casually in Sydney but I didn't know it was such a big thing!

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  10. Joared, your comment came up on email but not on the blog. Comment as follows: "You hit on my pet peeve -- clothes and shoes should be comfortable. I went along with the expected shoe style for awhile because it was expected where I worked. I've hated many women's shoe styles and can't for the life of me see why they're tolerated. I ceased wearing anything that wasn't comfortable decades ago".

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    1. Joared: Good for you, going strictly for comfort!

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  11. Many years ago when I was in the working world and dress-up was the fashion, I wore dress heels to work. Now years afterward, my bunioned feet could no sooner look at, much less wear anything other than flat shoes. Now, casual attire is my preferred style and its sneakers and jeans for me and thankfully retirement too!

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    1. Beatrice: A lot of women must be relieved when they can retire and abandon uncomfortable working clothes.

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