In particular it seems like an eternity from the years when I was still dating and wondering if I would find a long-term partner or if I would become a lonely old codger.
Am I glad I'm not dating any more. I read about people's disappointing dating experiences - dates who aren't what they expected, dates with embarrassing mannerisms, dates who turn out to be married etc etc - and I'm thankful I don't have to go through all that again.
I don't have to ask myself all those awkward pre-dating questions. What will she think of me? Will she find me boring? Will she think I'm weird? Will she like the way I'm dressed? Will she be put off by my height or my voice or my taste in books/films/music?
The whole dating scenario is now so long ago that I can barely remember it, but I must have been a bundle of nerves every time I went out with someone new and hoped they might be "the one".
What a relief it is to have a long-term partner who is as devoted to me as I am to her, and I'm no longer looking for "a likely prospect". We can just enjoy each other's company and let the years go by.
I can hear about people's dating horror stories without having to add a dozen horror stories of my own.
It does sound dreadful, doesn’t it? I would be so leery of dating apps.
ReplyDeleteBijoux: People do strike lucky though. A former blogmate (she just vanished one day) said that she had a string of ghastly experiences before she met a lovely guy and they hit it off immediately.
DeleteWhat a pain in the [hindquarters] that was. Eventually I realized that the kind of people you meet on dating sites (I don't think there were "apps" back when I was that age) are people who couldn't get a partner in a more conventional way because there was something wrong with them, behaviorally or otherwise.
ReplyDeleteBut yes, it was stressful because the stakes felt so high. Nowadays I don't think they would.
Infidel: Is that right, that people on dating sites are usually oddballs? Certainly by all accounts some dates can turn out to be pretty peculiar.
DeleteBack in the day I met people through life....parties, an almost husband through work, a ski club, things like that. I never went out with someone I hadn't already met. If I end up widowed I can tell you I will stay single. No dating site for seniors for me!!
ReplyDeleteSandra: If I end up a widower, I don't think I could live with anyone else. I'd have to adjust to a completely new set of idiosyncrasies and weird habits!
DeleteI met most of mine through the sailing club or the rugby club so they were hardly unknown quantities. I don't think I would be happy with the dating apps of today just as i would not have been happy with the small ads which were the equivalent then..
ReplyDeleteAnon: Yes, there were some pretty bizarre small ads! No dating sites needed for my parents, who met each other while serving in WW2.
DeleteOddly, I know so many couples who met on line and find their "ones" I tried it so long ago now I forget all the "dates." Fun at the time, though a lot were NOT their photos or even their purported ages.
ReplyDeleteMaybe I am very fussy and maybe my life is too busy with stuff that entrances me but surprisingly I've had quite a few proposals even when disintegrating. No, not for me but thanks.
XO
WWW
www: Lying about age seems to be very common. What's the point of pretending to be ten years younger? And if you've lied about your age, what else will you be lying about?
DeleteDating today looks so artificial. Getting in touch with a person through a dating app, is difficult to imagine for me. I stumbled over my luggage in Paris airport and when I tried to get up , I looked into green eyes belonging to Saïd. The beginning of our love. Saïd loves to tell the story.
ReplyDeleteHannah
Hannah: That's a very romantic story. Lucky you had some luggage to stumble over!
DeleteNick, believe me I felt quite stupid and ridiculous . I still stumble today quite often due to my eye problems, but Saïd was at the right moment at the right place.
DeleteHannah
Hannah: As you say, the right moment at the right place!
DeleteI only dated guys I met through one activity or another. But, I married at 19 so there weren't even a lot of them. I got a really good one, though, and we are still happy together these many years later.
ReplyDeleteLinda
Linda: We both struck lucky!
DeleteAfter my husband passed away I knew I would never date again. There's no way I'm starting over.
ReplyDeleteMary: I'm sure I'd feel the same if I lost Jenny.
DeleteI've never used a dating app, and back after my divorce, I decided never to date again.
ReplyDeleteIt was then I met my life long partner...after I'd sworn off dating!
Val: The twists and turns of fate! I never used any dating service. I met Jenny when we were both working in a London bookshop.
DeleteNick, my husband and I consider ourselves lucky in that we did meet online through a dating app that most likely no longer exists. We never exchanged photos or spoke on the phone until our first meet-up which was a few months later. As of this ay, we've been together for 27 years and married for nearly 25. Sometimes these things do turn out right, thankfully.
ReplyDeleteBeatrice: Lucky indeed. So online dating isn't always a washout!
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