Thursday 6 May 2021

Letting rip

I'm baffled by people who get some sort of kick out of criticising total strangers - people they've never met, maybe never heard of up till now, people they know nothing whatever about, people who have nothing to do with their own lives.

They don't care how insulting or hurtful or ignorant their criticism might be. They don't care what effect they're having on the people concerned. They don't care if what they're saying is a complete fabrication. They think it's perfectly okay to put the boot in whenever they feel like it.

I try to avoid such gratuitous attacks on people. I'm no fan of the royal family, but I don't lay into them at every opportunity*. I just ignore them. Naturally I'm aware of all the scandals involving public figures, but I don't promptly add my vitriolic comments to the usual social media pile-on. I mind my own business.

My mother was fond of making disparaging remarks about homosexuals. I used to ask her why she was so obsessed with a group of people totally unconnected with her own life, whom she'd never met, who didn't affect her life in any way, but she wouldn't listen.

There are plenty of people whose views I disagree with, whose personal behaviour appals me, whose mad ambitions alarm me, but I don't feel the need to publicly hurl abuse at them or tear them to bits. I have much more interesting things to do.

It's now routine for public figures, especially women, to get torrents of unrelenting hatred day in and day out. Why should anyone have to live with this kind of permanent denigration? I'm certainly not going to add to it.

*the racist and misogynistic abuse heaped on Meghan Markle is quite shocking.

29 comments:

  1. You "have much more interesting things to do". So why not do them instead of wasting your time on a blog post maligning people who malign others?

    U

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  2. Because it’s easy to do when you can do it behind a screen name? I guess it makes them feel better about themselves to be critical of others.

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    1. Bijoux: Yes, I'm sure they do it to feel better about themselves - and to feel superior to those they're criticising.

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  3. As the old saying goes, to understand anyone, you have to walk a mile in their moccasins.
    Some thrive on others' misfortunes, I wouldn't waste time on them.

    XO
    WWW

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    1. www: Unfortunately, you're right, some people thrive on others' misfortunes. The more catastrophic the misfortune, the more they enjoy the gloating.

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  4. Brexit brought out some of the most spiteful behaviour I have ever seen.I remember a friend asking on her FB page if anyone preferring to leave the EU would put up their reasons...so I did. No reaction to speak of...a slight amount of discussion...but on other FB pages - interactions with other friends - I found myself to be the butt of the most scurrilous attacks by people who did not participate in the orginal discussion, but who were eager to dive in on other topics. Most impolite to the FB 'owners' of the posts where they displayed their spite - and all too evident of their lack of any odea of discussion.

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    1. Fly: I think Brexit is partly responsible for all the vicious attacks that seem to be routine nowadays. It polarised people into supporting one side or the other in a very aggressive way and that polarisation is now the norm. I see a lot of very heated exchanges on Facebook and I just keep well away from them.

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  5. I agree with your view entirely, Nick. Sure there are many people from performers to politicians and lots in between whose behaviors may be obnoxious or annoying to me. But I don't know or care about them and to expand energy and thought disparaging them or their actions would take time way from my interests. It's WHY I have no other social presence other than blogging, which is quite enough for me.

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    1. Beatrice: Indeed, why waste energy on people you just happen to dislike? I do have a Facebook page but thankfully it doesn't attract those belligerent ding-dongs that I have no time for.

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  6. I'm with Beatrice; I don't do social media other than blogs. That lets me choose who to read. And my primary blog is hidden from search engines so unless I have invited you in, you won't know it's there.

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    1. Linda: I would never join Twitter, it's a complete madhouse of extreme emotions and opinions.

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  7. Amen. I think we've seen a gradual decline in civility (and in my own country a precipitous decline when Trump was elected) and I also think the semi-anonymity of the internet has emboldened the trolls.

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    1. Agent: I agree, civility is hard to find these days, people feel free to blurt out the most abusive comments.

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  8. It's a distracting waste of energy, and time, to be involved in other folk's drama.

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    1. Joanne: It is. But some people must spend hours every day churning out all the hatred and bile.

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  9. I have been watching the royal family ever since I can remember and I have been watching the Meghan & Harry kerfuffle with great interest.
    I think they have behaved abominably, I don't know who was the main driver of that behaviour but if it was her, my assessment is neither misogynistic nor racist, it's just what i think.
    It doesn't matter what colour a person is or what genitalia they have, a public attack on family, available for viewing by the whole world, is a deeply self centred and destructive way to make a point.

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    1. Kylie: You have a point about attacking your own family. But if Meghan felt the royal family were treating her like an undesirable, then I guess she's entitled to push back and to keep away from them.

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    2. Yes, she's entitled to push back, she didn't do anything illegal so everything they have done is within their rights but it's sure not behaviour I can think well of.
      I'm not being racist, I'm just not favourably impressed by the entitled whining and public bitching

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    3. Kylie: I think I'll keep a dignified silence at this point.

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  10. whatever happened to simple Kindness?

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    1. Tammy: A good question. As hard to find nowadays as honesty and empathy.

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  11. Unfortunately, we are witnessing in people their sheer disagreeableness. Sometimes I am surprised by who is expressing their rudeness. Rudeness is much different than a different opinion. For the younger crowd, I think their people skills are weaker in that they have spent a great deal of time on a computer than playing with their friends.

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    1. Ann: I don't talk to many youngsters, but my impression of their people skills is much the same as yours. Though I hasten to add that there are many exceptions to this generalisation.

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    2. When you grow up with parents who have no social skills how are you supposed to learn them?

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    3. Linda: Good point. But hopefully teachers might cultivate those social skills if the parents are lacking.

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  12. Yes, especially online people can be very rude.

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    1. Mary: Some of the stuff I catch glimpses of online is totally beyond the pale.

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  13. I'd rather clean my toilet with an old toothbrush than get worked up about minor celebs publishing children's books, falling out with their family, and having tedious interviews with Oprah.
    Sx

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    1. Ms Scarlet: I wouldn't go that far, lol, but I can think of a hundred more profitable ways to pass the time.

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