Thursday, 25 July 2019

Hair talk

Hair. Something that spawns a hundred opinions. Compli-mentary, censorious, shocked, delighted. People are seldom emotionally neutral about a hairstyle, either their own or someone else's.

So let me share some of my own opinions about hair:
  • I've only had three hairstyles in 72 years. As a kid I had a parting, as a twenty something I had a long hair and a beard, and now the parting (and the beard) is long gone.
  • A lot of people with curly hair would prefer straight hair (my own is straight), but I love curly hair. Especially wild Jewish and Afro hair. I'm baffled by the prejudice against natural Afro hair.
  • I'm also baffled by the prejudice against ginger hair. I love it.
  • I love dreadlocks and corn rows.
  • I like dyed hair, but I also like natural grey hair.
  • I love short haired women. And short hair is so much easier to look after.
  • Some people have hairstyles that totally don't suit them. But you can't say so.
  • Hair that droops over someone's eyes is rather ridiculous.
  • I'd hate to be bald. But I don't fancy a wig.
  • Comb-overs are absurd. You'll never catch me with one.
  • Why is the simplest woman's haircut twice the price of a man's?
  • Men's hairstyles are odd right now. Undercut, Caesar cut, buzz cut, Mohawk. Strange mixtures of long hair and short hair.
  • I'm wary of men with buzz cuts. Are they drug dealers or paramilitaries? Or both?
  • I don't have any fancy shampoos. I just buy the cheapest I can find.
  • I tried not washing my hair for a while, as supposedly hair is self-cleaning. I just ended up with stinky hair.
Basically I prefer women's hairstyles to men's. They're more imaginative and they don't look like a prison cut. And they're nicer to fondle. But jeez they're a lot more fuss and bother.


  1. I raise my hand to having a ridiculous fringe! But it covers my bald eyebrow.

  2. Just curious, Nick, why would you assume somebody is a drug dealer or a paramilitary because they have a buzzcut?
    I keep my hair clipper as close as possible for two reasons: I find hair to be a faff, and it makes life so much easier to not have it, plus it's preferable to showing off the massively receding hair line and the big hole in the middle.
    Don't judge a book by its cover, because I'm definitely neither of those things!
    Aside from that, I'd go along with most of your list, and I must admit I find redhead women most alluring.

  3. Ms Scarlet: Well, covering your bald eyebrow is obviously essential, and I give you full permission to hide it with your hairdo.

  4. Captain Custard: Ah, I should have put that in context. In Northern Ireland a buzz cut is strongly favoured by drug dealers and paramilitaries (who incidentally are usually the same people with different hats). I've no idea what hairstyle is popular among English (or Scottish or Welsh) drug dealers; perhaps you could enlighten me? And of course paramilitaries don't exist in England, they're a peculiar NI phenomenon.

    No reflection on yourself and your own hairdo habits, which sound extremely sensible!

  5. Don't know any drug dealers, so I can't help you there I'm afraid.
    The buzzcut is quite popular here amongst older guys because as you pointed out, combovers and wigs look ridiculous.

  6. Is a buzzcut the same thing as shaving off all the hair? It looks apalling if that is what it is...distinctly thuggish.

  7. I don't have that many opinions on hair. I just think some beards are gross when they hang off the chin in the ZZ Top and Duck Dynasty look.

  8. Captain Custard: I don't know any drug dealers either, but the ones who appear in the media usually have that buzzcut look.

    Helen: It's a combination of shaved hair round the sides and back and very short hair on top. Usually done with electric clippers. Thuggish-looking indeed.

  9. Bijoux: I agree, that type of beard is even more laughable than the ordinary ones. And what on earth is the point? Is it supposed to be ultra-masculine?

  10. I keep my hair short and clean and focus my attention on other things. The older we get the better it is to prioritize.

  11. I don't do much with my hair, I just let it grow. Right now I'd like a long braid. I envy those women who have silver white hair. Mine is a piebald, every colour under the sun. It looks like a bad dye job but all natural.

    Minimum attention is my hairstyle. I don't understand those who spend so much on getting a "younger" look. Ageism. Sad.


  12. Jean: I agree entirely with your sense of priorities!

    www: Silver white hair is wonderful. Strange that your hair is so many different colours!

    It's extraordinary how much time and money some people devote to getting the most perfect, most fashionable, most flattering, most impressive hairdo. What drudgery!

  13. with a few exceptions in all the years since I've been an adult...
    I have had the pixie cut. even at that there are many variations. though all are short. I call it that because it was the rage that year that I first had it cut and the name stuck. it was easy because haircutters anywhere all knew what you meant. only wow. sometimes I looked like I had just been let out of a sanitarium! I didn't mind it really short but I still wanted it to look feminine! I do an okay job and I save a lot of money because I have cut my own hair for decades now. it's quick. it's easy and I like it.
    as Monk says... on to better and more interesting things! :D

  14. Tammy: I like the pixie cut. It's still pretty popular, isn't it? I've sometimes emerged from the hairdresser looking like I've just left the sanitarium. They got a bit carried away when I said I wanted it fairly short.

    I've never tried cutting my own hair. I'm sure I'd make an awful mess of it. And as I said, a man's hairdresser charges much less than a woman's (currently £9.50 or $11.85).

  15. Dave regularly gets his hair cut very short. He does that to facilitate his dermatologist finding the new Basel cell cancers he frequently develops. i used to wear mine long and straight but now I'm with Tammy in that a pixie cut is much easier to care for.

  16. Can I request you find a palm oil free shampoo?

  17. Always appreciated my golden red hair which has given way to gray, blond and light brownish color the bottom few inches to the ends. Have let my hair grow long since I retired though I wore it short most of my life after gave up my girlish pigtails and long red curls ala Shirley Temple when I was really young. Best haircuts I ever received were from a barber, but had to watch as he was prone to shingle it up the back like a man’s which I didn’t want. My once thick hair is thinning which I wish wasn’t happening, but have been unable to stop it. Have to laugh and say, which will go first — me or my hair?

  18. Linda: Well, that's a good reason for keeping his hair short. Makes me wonder what my own hair might be hiding....

    Kylie: I have two shampoos, neither of them containing palm oil. Pure coincidence, as I wasn't thinking of palm oil when I bought them.

  19. John: I also have a bald spot, which most of the time I can't even see so I'm not bothered. But as I say, I'd hate to be totally bald.

    Joared: Didn't know what shingling meant, had to look it up! Gray, blond and light brown is an interesting mixture. My hair is also getting thinner, but there's still plenty of it, so all is not lost! Indeed, which will go first, me or my hair?

  20. Since I am blessed with a bald pate with just a friar's fringe, I am not qualified to comment!

  21. Ramana: You could always try an Afro wig!!!

  22. I haven't had my hair professionally cut in more than a decade. When I wore it long and in a ponytail, I just trimmed it occasionally myself. And since it's come back from chemo, I've yet to cut it. I'm enjoying having it curly but I really loved the ease of it when it first came back and was really short. I'll probably go back to that when it goes straight again.

    Incidentally, my younger son has his head buzzed. He works in the hot son with a landscaping company and it's cooler than having hair. He's not remotely a thug. And both my boys went through experimental hair phases. I've seen them in dreads, with a mohawk, dyed multi-colored, you name it. I thought it was fun and since it's just hair and not a permanent change, I supported their wish to express themselves that way.

  23. Agent: I love your curly hair but yes, short hair is much easier to manage.

    My wariness of buzz cuts is very much a local Northern Ireland thing. I have no problem with buzz cuts as such, but here they're definitely favoured by the law-breakers and bad boys.