Tuesday 26 February 2019

Cringeworthy

When a movie or TV sitcom depicts someone as a bit hopeless - awkward, dim-witted, socially inept, accident-prone etc - I might cringe a bit, I might want to stop looking, but mainly I just find it amusing. Yet a lot of people find such scenes so embarrassing they can't bear it and have to stop watching.

They empathise with the person so much that it's actually painful to go on watching. Even if it's pure fiction, and not real life, they can't endure it. I gather it's called second-hand embarrassment.

I think it rather depends how far the ineptness goes. If it's just a few seconds of awkwardness, it's endearing. But if the person is persistently seen as Harriet Hopeless, and everything she does goes wrong, then it gets embarrassing and cringeworthy and I'd rather not watch it.

But I've never been so deeply affected that watching becomes painful. That suggests an amazing degree of empathy and identifying.

Which leads to the question, does popular entertainment rely too much on ridiculing people, wheeling on the classic bumbling halfwit, the resident figure of fun?

I don't think so. After all, we're talking about fictional characters, people we can laugh at with impunity. When we meet such characters in everyday life, of course we treat them with the appropriate tact and tolerance. Or should do.

The fact is hopeless characters are funny. There's something about them stumbling around in confusion that's amusing, for all sorts of reasons. They reflect our own insecurities about screwing things up. They're vulnerable. They're endearing. We want to help them out. And they're more interesting than people who get everything right.

It's no accident that the most popular person in Fawlty Towers has always been Manuel, the clueless Spanish waiter who never knows if he's coming or going and can't understand anything Basil says to him.

I certainly have my own streak of awkwardness and social ineptness. But that's another story.

23 comments:

  1. I am spared such experiences as I simply do not watch TV. I have stopped going to movies too due to my COPD but, before that, I did not mind watching such scenes and treat them as comedy.

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  2. Ramana: Me too. The point is that they're fictional, not real.

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  3. I usually stop watching such things because they are painfully badly written and predictable to the point of boredom, not because I'm empathising!
    Sx

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  4. Ms Scarlet: That as well. It's the number of TV programmes I have to turn off that's painful, not the clueless characters.

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  5. I think they can be funny because they are magnified images of all of us. Everyone's been in awkward situations or bumbled something on occasion.

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  6. I don’t mind mild depictions of awkwardness, but when it’s over the top I don’t like it much. Not becaus I’m feeling any vicarious awkwardness, just because it makes me a little impatient. Especially if it strains credulity.

    As for whether popular entertainment relies too much on ridiculing others, I’d say yes. I think it appeals to the baser side of humans. And I find that disturbing.

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  7. When I was in grade school, in a class discussion, I wondered about the cartoon character called Mr. Bulgebottom and why we laughed at him. The teacher explained to me that all the characters we laughed at were because of our recognition of the fact, There but for the Grace of God go I.

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  8. Bijoux: Exactly, they're magnified images of all of us. And there's something about a person being out of their depth that makes us laugh.

    Agent: I suppose I feel impatient if the fumbling goes on too long. I think, okay I get the point, he's generally klutzy, can we move on now? But yes, I guess it sometimes panders to our baser element.

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  9. Joanne: I've never come across Mr Bulgebottom, but just the name is off-putting! Over here there's a term "lard arse", which probably means much the same. Yes, there but for the grace of God....

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  10. Manuel was the most popular Fawlty Towers character?! I liked them all, but Basil would be my favorite by far. I think you're a good bit younger than I (I'm 70), and I must confess to being pretty out of the loop where modern entertainment is concerned. One reason for this is that commercials take up way too much of a show, and another reason is that there's a coarseness to the comedies that I don't care for, and a degree of graphic imagery that I (former undertaker and ambulance driver that I am) object to in the crime dramas. I don't even know the names of the shows, and I probably name any of the actors--than Smollett, of course.

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  11. Andy and I mostly laugh at ourselves nowadays. It's free, good for the body and spirit, and is great for bonding. :)

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  12. Snowbrush: Actually I'm coming up to 72! I've been annoyed by the commercial breaks ever since I can remember. Agreed, there's some rather graphic imagery out there, but it's nothing compared to some of the imagery you see in real life. And I have to say the behaviour of our politicians worries me a lot more than whatever I encounter on TV.

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  13. Jean: True, there's no charge for laughing at oneself!

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  14. If I want to watch inadequates performing badly I can watch the House of Commons live...

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  15. I can't watch Fawlty Towers. Way too much bumbling for me. I find it irritating. I am not fond of making fun of anyone's nature. Except I did enjoy watching Archie Bunker and Edith.

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  16. Not having TV I don't see that much of what you describe. I don't like my comedy to be obvious but I do enjoy a clumsy awkward character who always gets their way, Laurel and Hardy come to mind.
    I can't bare slapstick as I cringe and feel pained, a banana slip-fall has always horrified me sometimes to the point of tears.
    But clever humour gets me, Fawlty Towers was brilliant in that everyone knew better than Basil who believed he was running things but never was.
    XO
    WWW

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  17. Helen: You're telling me. I see Hyacinth Bucket (from "Keeping Up Appearances") as Theresa May and Mr Bean as Jeremy Corbyn.

    Linda: But I would say fictional characters are fair game, as no actual person gets hurt. Unlike the bumblers in real life.

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  18. www: Laurel and Hardy are very funny. Likewise Del Trotter from "Only Fools and Horses" (one of the most popular sitcoms ever). Very true about Basil always fondly believing he was running the show.

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  19. Nick,
    But those fictional characters are based on real life so people who have similar characteristics can be hurt by those exaggerations.

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  20. Linda: That's true, I guess. I hadn't really thought of it like that. Which gets us into the whole business of trigger warnings and whether they actually help people or not.

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  21. I can watch a bumbling fictional character although it not my favourite form of comedy.
    Popular entertainment uses a LOT of disgracefully humiliating content : dating shows, biggest loser, reality cop shows etc.
    I remember a show with a cop pulling over a drunk driver who was seriously inebriated. She was sitting in the gutter with her dress falling off. It was just cruel and there are so many scenes like that

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  22. I’ve enjoyed “Keeping Up Appearances”, a lot of John Cleese comedy and characters, some of the slapstick comedy including Laurel and Hardy. I don’t watch that many TV sit coms, but all sorts of characters seem to be portrayed in all types of programs. What you describe reminds me of Jerry Lewis. I always thought he patterned his awkward movements after physical problems of Muscular Dystrophy. He never revealed the source of his character creation, but then when he started the MD charity I was inclined to think this was his payback.

    I tend to think such characters show us how imperfect we are. Someone somewhere, if not us, likely identifies with such people’s behavior though usually what they do is exaggerated or magnified.

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  23. Kylie: Those reality shows seem very humiliating (and often cruel) to me, yet there are people queuing up to be on the shows. Do they enjoy the humiliation? Do they enjoy the attention? Do they not feel humiliated? It baffles me.

    Joared: I never liked Jerry Lewis, I thought his comedy was rather juvenile. But that's interesting what you say about muscular dystrophy.

    Yes, we can laugh at our own imperfections more easily when they're reflected in someone else.

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