Tuesday, 16 May 2017

Amorous outrage

Goodness, people do over-react to public displays of affection. You'd think they'd never seen a couple publicly kissing before. Or holding each other's hands. Or fondling each other enthus-iastically. Why all the prudish tut-tutting?

The Daily Mail reported that "Emmanuel Macron was seen kissing his glamorous wife after being inaugurated as France's youngest ever president".

This is news? The French President kissing his wife in public? (Never mind the irrelevant opinion that she's "glamorous") Is such kissing a revolutionary act? Do we need to know they're capable of kissing each other? Might we otherwise suspect they hate each other and avoid kissing at all costs? Why is the act of kissing so significant?

The media were equally obsessed when President Trump held hands with Theresa May. And when Victoria Beckham kissed her daughter Harper. And when Artem Lukyanenko was all over Ksienija ┼Żuk at the Eurovision Song Contest.

But it's not just the media of course. Ordinary folk can get amazingly steamed up about "inappropriate intimacy" in a public place.

Unless they're so over-excited "get a room" seems the only possible response, who cares if people are showing their affection for each other? Is that such a sin? Considering the gloom and worry on so many faces nowadays, isn't it rather sweet that two people are so fond of each other and obviously enjoying life?

There are many things more disturbing than a visibly amorous couple. Like people who leave litter everywhere, or scream racist abuse, or vandalise public property, or pester passing women.

The more public affection the better. It brightens my day.


  1. Considering what people seem to watch on the box I find it impossible to understand why they get uptight about public signs of affection in real life.

  2. Helen: Indeed. It seems that just about anything is acceptable on TV, including full-on sex, dismembered corpses and brutal violence. Yet a bit of public kissing prompts instant priggishness.

  3. I thought we were the puritans over here? i agree with Helen that the media is full of over the top displays. I haven't heard of anyone complaining about it in a long time.

  4. Who is outraged? Maybe I'm reading the wrong stuff. Lol.


  5. Bijoux: I think there are plenty of puritans in Britain, but they're often reluctant to say anything. There's a total lack of surveys on the subject, so I really don't know if my impression of widespread distaste is right or wrong.

    www: As I said to Bijoux, I can't find any relevant surveys, so it may be there's more tolerance than I imagine. But I've noticed that PDAs are pretty rare in this neighbourhood, which suggests a sense of possible disapproval. I never see couples kissing each other goodbye, for example.

  6. Idont mind affection
    I draw the line at people EATING EACH OTHER

  7. Honestly, Nick, sometimes I think you should take up bird watching.


  8. John: Amen to that. And any under-clothes groping.

    Ursula: My father was a keen bird watcher. I think he was keener on birds than he was on human beings.

  9. I'm not getting much sense of whether you lot are happy with PDAs or not. It seems like you're really not bothered unless they're actually humping each other in the middle of the road (Cue Paul McCartney, Why Don't We Do It In The Road?)

  10. Yes, Public display of affection.

    It's a matter of taste. Tongue down throat? No. That's not even a matter of showing "affection". It's sexual. Which is private.

    I do not believe that the new French President kissing his wife on victory makes anyone bat an eyelid. Take Obama. I think him a hugely warm and affectionate man - but not in an in your face way. Unlike the Pussy Grabber who'd like to screw his daughter if only it were legal (the question whether she would want him to doesn't appear to enter the equation - arsehole. But then nothing adds up what with that guy. I am amazed Kushner hasn't given his father-in-law a black eye. I am even more amazed that Ivanka herself, or her mother, or anyone, hasn't given her father a black eye.)

    I know you won't agree but even people holding hands when walking down the street I find rather pathetic. It looks so needy. Unless it's a parent and their child. Or a very old couple - in which case it brings tears to my eyes. However, my dear Nick, when tottering on high heels and after a night out, you'd offer me your arm I will gladly hang off it.

    As to McCartney: They did "do it on the road". Crossing Abbey Road - and touring.


  11. i dont much mind, one way or the other

  12. Ursula: I think I'd also draw the line at tongue down throat.

    I'm also amazed that Trump hasn't been punched by someone. Or worse. In his case it's more a question of a Public Display of Patriarchy. Yes, who could possibly take offence at Barack Obama showing his physical affection for someone?

    Jenny and I sometimes hold hands in the street. I think it's a lovely sign of affection and I'm surprised more couples don't do it. I hope you don't totter on high heels. Heels are sheer masochism for the benefit of leering males.

    I lived in Abbey Road at one time, but I never saw any of the Beatles at the Studios.

  13. Kylie: Very philosophical!

  14. i'm fine with it usually. there's nothing wrong with showing affection. i'd rather witness that than see and hear a nasty argument!
    john gray's comment made me laugh and then i cringed at remembering something I saw in a restaurant once.
    maybe they were newlyweds I don't know. but they literally fed each other. seriously! then they would kiss rather passionately. (sharing bites??? who knows!)
    i'm certainly not a puritan. but... ewwww.
    it kind of made me sick. it was very YUK. every eye in the restaurant was on them as they did this. in disbelief I think.
    and of course I imagine that was part of the fun of the game to them! we should have all just ignored them.
    or... I KNOW! we should have gotten a ball cap (there's always someone wearing one) and stood up and announced out loud that this poor couple obviously needs a room and can't afford one. then we would pass the hat and ask for a small donation from everybody. each person could give a penny or a nickel. it would be strictly symbolic of course.
    and as I write this I realize the young couple probably wouldn't get the point much less care even if they did! LOL!!!

  15. Tammy: Hear hear, better a loving embrace than people quarrelling.

    I think a couple feeding each other the odd titbit from their different dishes is okay (Jenny and I often swap samples of our desserts). But were they actually feeding each other the whole meal? I like your suggested response. I suppose you could have just passed them a written message "Get a room"!

  16. I don't mind displays of affection - generally I think it's sweet. And I certainly hold hands or hug or kiss my spouse in public. I would prefer people not to actually grope each other in public - that does seem to cross a line.

  17. It always warms my heart to see couples holding hands when they walk together, especially elderly couples.

  18. I totally agree with you about sharing the occasional bite off each other's plate!
    this couple was actually feeding the other like you do a baby in a highchair. then they would close their eyes and kiss and it was all done very slowly and seductively.
    i'm actually surprised they were not asked to leave. it was a family type restaurant!
    like monk says...
    I especially like to see affection between two older people. some just sit across from each other or walk and never say a word! or they look very grumpy!
    I vote affection!

  19. Agent: I agree, groping definitely crosses a line.

    Jean: Me too. It's such a visible sign of affection.

    Tammy: I'm also surprised the manager didn't discreetly ask them to behave more like grown adults!

    Yes, elderly couples often look grumpy and taciturn. Surely life can't be that bad?

  20. Didn't you know -- violence is in and love is out???

  21. Joared: (face palm) Of course, I totally forgot! Any amount of sickening violence is just fine. Well, on TV at any rate.

  22. Kissing and hugging and holding hands and even a discrete grope under the t shirt,my husBand and I, we love it all . As you say violence seems not to be a problem , but love signs provoke often a disaproval. What a strange society.
    Mia More

  23. Mia: It's a very strange society. Prostitution is widely acceptable, but two people publicly kissing each other is seen as controversial.

  24. Like Ursula suggests, bird watching, particularly the amorous pairs of the human variety appeals to me too. I don't find it the least disturbing if it does not disturb them. All the best to them,

  25. Ramana: It's hard to understand how some people can find a bit of romantic canoodling disturbing.