Inside outside

 

Isn't it weird that we can never see ourselves as others see us, because we're always inside ourselves looking out and can never be outside ourselves looking in (or at).

I might think of myself as having a rather nondescript appearance, while others see me as very distinctive. I might consider myself kind and considerate, while others think I'm somewhat mean and selfish. I might imagine I'm highly intelligent while others think I'm rather a dimwit.

Wouldn't it be interesting if I could step outside myself for 24 hours and see myself as others see me? Would it be a bit of a shock as my rosy picture of myself was rapidly demolished? Or would it be a pleasant surprise as I discovered I was more appealing than I thought I was? And would I be embarrassed by some of my daft remarks and clumsy gestures?

I might think someone has got me completely wrong, only to find out that actually they've caught the real me.

If only some of those public figures who think they're so wonderful could stand outside themselves and be confronted with the mortifying reality....

Sailing along

As we get older we're supposed to get more and more indifferent to what others think of us and just go sailing happily along in our own little self-centred bubble.

I don't find that at all. If anything I'm more aware of what others think of me and more concerned that someone might have a negative opinion of me.

I think I was probably more indifferent to other people's view of me when I was a child. Children are notoriously oblivious to how people see them and casually blurt out anything that comes to mind. I'm sure I was just like that, causing offence and shock and disbelief everywhere I went.

Of course that's partly because children don't have much of a stake in their surroundings. They're not home owners worrying how the neighbours see them, or employees worrying how the boss sees them. They just do their thing in a state of blissful self-indulgence.

No, as I grow older I consider other people's reactions to what I say or do all the time. I certainly don't go blundering along upsetting everybody. Children may have the excuse of a tender age but an adult of 77 has no excuse whatever.

I watch all the politicians saying anything that occurs to them, however offensive or contemptuous or untrue and I wonder how they can bring themselves to be so recklessly outspoken. If only they could think before they speak, people might have a bit more respect for them.