That's certainly the attitude here in Belfast. It's very unusual to see a couple kissing, holding hands, embracing or just stroking each other fondly. If they're greeting each other, or saying farewell, they might hug or kiss, but in general such behaviour in public is strictly taboo.
Some people would go so far as to say they find such displays "disgusting" or "vulgar", while others just find them embarrassing or theatrical.
Personally I'm not bothered by public affection, as long it doesn't descend into anything overtly sexual. I like to see people showing their love for each other. It's especially nice to see older couples holding hands or kissing. And it's equally nice to see young couples in the first flush of romance and enjoying each other's bodies. Why shouldn't they?
Of course it's mainly heterosexual couples who indulge in such public affection. Despite more relaxed attitudes to sexual preferences, gay couples still aren't free to express their feelings so visibly in case of hostile reactions. It's quite a surprise when I see a couple of women or a couple of men holding hands or kissing. It's still a brave thing to do.
When I was growing up, it was generally understood that the back row of the cinema was reserved for amorous couples, exploring each other as enthusiastically as they liked. I'm not sure if that tradition still holds but certainly there's no sign of it at our local cinemas. Patrons of the Queens Film Theatre are far too genteel to favour "that sort of thing".
I like shows of affection. Much better than shows of hatred.
PS: Jenny points out that a woman might feel uncomfortable about a public embrace, but is loath to make a fuss in the midst of a busy street.
PPS: The coronavirus has put rather a dampener on any kind of intimacy for the time being....
I like kissing in public
ReplyDelete( watching and doing)
But not eating in public
John: I remember when people eating in public was a rarity. Now it's commonplace and hardly anyone seems to object. My personal grouse is not the eating but the take-away litter people drop everywhere.
DeleteI've never heard of a general attitude towards it either way here. I suppose some don't like it and the others just ignore it or join along.
ReplyDeleteBijoux: I suppose it's just one of those new trends that you adapt to - like eating in the street or people making phone calls on the bus.
DeleteIn India, it was simply not on till a few years ago. I am told that now however one can see a lot of public show of affection among couples though the older ones are uncomfortable even seeing those.
ReplyDeleteRamana: I suppose if you've been brought up to regard public affection as unthinkable, it's hard to get used to seeing it.
DeleteOne's children can be put out by canoodling but not as much as one's dog is.
ReplyDeleteLiz: Oh dear. Has George been exposed to a lot of canoodling?
DeleteI don't mind seeing it or doing it as long as its not more than holding hands, a hug or a kiss.
ReplyDeleteMary: Agreed. Some forms of intimacy are still better confined to the bedroom!
DeleteI love seeing couples holding hands. It warms my heart.
ReplyDeleteJean: My sentiments entirely. It makes me very happy.
Deleteditto on the holding of hands. it's just so sweet. any age really. but especially the very young and older people.
Deleteand I agree with you totally about people who eat on the street " My personal grouse is not the eating but the take-away litter people drop everywhere."
who picks up after them? wonder how they live at home? good thing it's none of my business!
I must be getting old and crotchety!
Tammy: Perhaps the fast food restaurants should be charged for every one of their cartons found in the street?
DeleteLOL! well I don't eat from those restaurants. but then they would just probably up the price of their horrible hamburgers. I suppose people who litter will always litter in spite of anything.
DeleteTammy: It must be hard to persuade an inveterate litter-dropper to change their habits and take their litter home with them.
DeleteThe best response I ever heard was someone picked up the litter and handed back to the dropper saying, "Excuse me; you dropped something."
DeleteLinda: Yes, I've heard that one too. I've never actually tried it myself. I can imagine someone saying "What's it got to do with you?"
DeleteDave and I hold hands a lot. I never gave a thought to it until a server at a restaurant told us she thought we were "cute" to be holding hands at our age.
ReplyDeleteLinda: Then Jenny and I must be pretty cute as well!
DeleteI sure don't see anything wrong with a little show of affection/love...like Jean says, seeing couples hold hands warms the heart.
ReplyDeleteRose: A couple holding hands is a lovely sight.
DeleteI enjoy seeing hand holding at any age. Lifts my heart.
ReplyDeleteJoanne: I'm with you all the way!
DeleteI still hold hands with Mr Blue!
ReplyDeleteWe are getting to grips with the elbow bump now.
Sx
Ms Scarlet: Good for you. I haven't tried the elbow bump yet, but I doubt if it's as satisfying as holding hands or kissing.
DeleteI'm a very affectionate person and not enough people have that necessity of hugging, etc. Not now obv. But I usually greet friends with a hug and kiss and of course family.
ReplyDeleteBut like Jenny says, many view this as an opportunity for inappropriate "feelz" and I ban them for life.
XO
WWW
www: Greeting someone with a hug and a kiss is absolutely routine in Northern Ireland, but that's definitely a no-no for the next few months.
DeleteI like to see people holding hands, the other stuff is good, but there is something really heartwarming about holding hands.
ReplyDeletePolly: Absolutely. It seems much more affectionate than a perfunctory two-second kiss.
DeleteI love to see people taking pleasure in each other while out in public, it seems sad that some people find it offensive. Young couples, old couples, middle-aged couples, of whatever sex; it's so much better than seeing people argue.
ReplyDeleteEryl: I agree. What on earth is offensive about people showing their love and affection for each other? The more the merrier, I say.
DeleteHand holding, pecks are one thing in public but full on heavy kissing is better privately, I think, since don’t know where that might lead. Won’t be seeing any of it now til this virus goes away and won’t be close enough to even hold hands in the meantime. Stay well!
ReplyDeleteJoared: As you say, we don't know where that might lead! But yes, the virus has turned physical contact into something positively hazardous.
Delete