tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post577276101430694760..comments2024-03-28T07:49:04.960+00:00Comments on nickhereandnow: A bit on the sidenickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-43717503599211413662021-04-26T12:03:58.044+01:002021-04-26T12:03:58.044+01:00Kylie: "When a person desperately wants to be...Kylie: "When a person desperately wants to be seen and their partner is not looking" Yes, that makes sense. True, there aren't necessarily hotel rooms and gifts. And you're right, I probably lack nuance. Put it down to my lack of personal experience in this area!nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-26632472732214760242021-04-26T11:25:36.141+01:002021-04-26T11:25:36.141+01:00When a person desperately wants to be seen and th...When a person desperately wants to be seen and their partner is not looking, that becomes exhausting. <br />Who says affairs consist of hotel rooms and gifts? It's mostly much more mundane than that.<br />You're lacking nuance, Nick. Again kyliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17733888108530605722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-39480265876844262942021-04-19T07:59:53.539+01:002021-04-19T07:59:53.539+01:00Agent: I guess in your job you've talked to qu...Agent: I guess in your job you've talked to quite a few straying partners, so it's interesting that you say sex isn't always that important. I think some people just like to prove they're still attractive to the opposite sex.nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-715535582093342442021-04-19T00:53:26.805+01:002021-04-19T00:53:26.805+01:00Not for me. But, it's a complicated issue. Men...Not for me. But, it's a complicated issue. Men and women cheat for a great variety of reasons, and sex isn't always that big a factor. Some people can rebuild after their partner has been unfaithful, others cannot. I am pretty sure I'd walk away, but who knows since I've never been faced with that in either marriage? Secret Agent Womanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07564690116156754219noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-72605958572165252962021-04-17T07:50:39.671+01:002021-04-17T07:50:39.671+01:00Beatrice: Glad to know everything turned out well ...Beatrice: Glad to know everything turned out well for you in the end. But a bit sad that he had to die in an industrial accident.nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-76078991319176016362021-04-17T00:30:39.138+01:002021-04-17T00:30:39.138+01:00I can attest firsthand that some people fall into ...I can attest firsthand that some people fall into this pattern so easily as did my former husband. My reaction was to file for divorce, which I did and have now been happily remarried for over 22 years. As for the ex, he married the girlfriend and years later was killed in an industrial accident, fate some people said.Beatrice P. Boydhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08281239556392874979noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-6729618411903876272021-04-16T17:15:57.822+01:002021-04-16T17:15:57.822+01:00Tammy: You'd imagine that grown-ups would thin...Tammy: You'd imagine that grown-ups would think carefully about the consequences of their surreptitious flings before throwing themselves at somebody. But no, the usual excuse is "they couldn't help themselves".nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-38720338579124154112021-04-16T14:23:32.837+01:002021-04-16T14:23:32.837+01:00so Sad all the way round. why can't people jus...so Sad all the way round. why can't people just Grow Up?<br />oh. but we're talking about 'grown ups' aren't we! <br />everything always seems to be about Sex or Money. <br />since the beginning of time. <br />plain old kindness and simplicity of life are apparently Boring to the masses of people!<br />whatever would they talk about or worry over? <br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-33728034208641473982021-04-16T08:17:44.782+01:002021-04-16T08:17:44.782+01:00Joanne: That's very unfortunate. But maybe not...Joanne: That's very unfortunate. But maybe not if you all ended up doing better than when you were married.nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-20515900335294870692021-04-16T00:49:03.093+01:002021-04-16T00:49:03.093+01:00Both my brothers had "a bit on the side"...Both my brothers had "a bit on the side". So did my husband. We all wound up divorced.Joanne Noragonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16601010208310707750noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-14025491377237739592021-04-15T22:34:58.583+01:002021-04-15T22:34:58.583+01:00Linda: Interesting that over such a long period yo...Linda: Interesting that over such a long period you could never work out what her need was. As you say, it probably went back to something in her childhood.nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-2642471065653860352021-04-15T22:32:51.703+01:002021-04-15T22:32:51.703+01:00Joared: Indeed, trying to deny your partner's ...Joared: Indeed, trying to deny your partner's responsibility is weird.nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-74268025164088455562021-04-15T22:31:15.349+01:002021-04-15T22:31:15.349+01:00Jean: I never thought for one second you'd be ...Jean: I never thought for one second you'd be interested in that sort of caper!nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-40792586528087591132021-04-15T22:30:29.800+01:002021-04-15T22:30:29.800+01:00Ann: Yes, it's strange that your neighbour did...Ann: Yes, it's strange that your neighbour didn't want you to talk to her husband. What was she trying to hide, I wonder?nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-89104368020195378712021-04-15T21:37:21.412+01:002021-04-15T21:37:21.412+01:00My mother was like that and I never understood her...My mother was like that and I never understood her need. She began sleeping around even before she married my dad at age 18, though, so the need went way back into her childhood somewhere. Yet she stayed married to my dad for eighteen years before they finally separated and it took them another three years to negotiate their divorce because she was too embarrassed to let him file based on her adultery.Linda Sandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12734450335251336493noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-58288929817971834622021-04-15T21:34:19.859+01:002021-04-15T21:34:19.859+01:00I find it curious that spouses being cheated on wh...I find it curious that spouses being cheated on who become angry often focus on person their partner is involved with as though its all that person’s fault. What? Doesn't the cheating spouse have some responsibility? I don't get it. Joaredhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03155775053108104385noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-91860140696677490802021-04-15T18:42:05.946+01:002021-04-15T18:42:05.946+01:00Andy and I are too busy playing with our toys and ...Andy and I are too busy playing with our toys and sharing our joys to waste time on that.CheerfulMonkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00934008738777906970noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-30771279508150637992021-04-15T18:32:07.073+01:002021-04-15T18:32:07.073+01:00For some it is a need for intimacy. For others, I ...For some it is a need for intimacy. For others, I think they are oversexed. But there is a myriad of reasons. I don't think it adds to anyone's life to have sex outside of a relationship. Being single, I have had married or committed partners being interested. <br /><br />I had a neighbor who met her husband when he was married. It was surreal how she did not want me to talk to him, there must be trust issues at work. I felt like saying I was not interested in her man; but I let sleeping dogs lie. Ann Bennetthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17759967601352382204noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-35837715819571029392021-04-15T17:06:38.877+01:002021-04-15T17:06:38.877+01:00www: I was deliberately avoiding specifying one se...www: I was deliberately avoiding specifying one sex or the other, except maybe Don Juan. Yes, there are plenty of women having affairs, and as you say for many reasons.nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-57008692960829758722021-04-15T17:05:03.478+01:002021-04-15T17:05:03.478+01:00Ms Scarlet: Yes, I think laziness also comes into ...Ms Scarlet: Yes, I think laziness also comes into it. It must take a lot of energy to maintain a parallel life.nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-75045856987482482592021-04-15T17:01:40.033+01:002021-04-15T17:01:40.033+01:00Mike: Glad to know you can count on mutual trust, ...Mike: Glad to know you can count on mutual trust, and for so many years.nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-29025601517846790582021-04-15T14:54:05.254+01:002021-04-15T14:54:05.254+01:00Very interesting that this is only perceived from ...Very interesting that this is only perceived from the male point of view. Women have affairs too. And for many, many reasons.<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-82325613657191316862021-04-15T13:51:16.242+01:002021-04-15T13:51:16.242+01:00No, I am far too lazy for that sort of malarkey. T...No, I am far too lazy for that sort of malarkey. There isn't enough time in the day - I don't mind a little harmless flirting... but to be fair, I haven't even seen anyone to do that with lately!<br />SxMs Scarlethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00449626572478125088noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-8972763756212158282021-04-15T13:39:48.828+01:002021-04-15T13:39:48.828+01:00No amount of temptation would be worth the risk to...No amount of temptation would be worth the risk to my relationship with my wife or the pain it would cause when (not if) she found out. <br /><br />(nearing 49 years of mutual trust and counting)Mike Goadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01909276588431011926noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-60824596599906947662021-04-15T12:49:06.367+01:002021-04-15T12:49:06.367+01:00Ramana: I didn't think it would be somehow!Ramana: I didn't think it would be somehow!nickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.com