tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post5389762046777424873..comments2024-03-28T07:49:04.960+00:00Comments on nickhereandnow: Crisis, what crisis?nickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comBlogger27125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-15531341638568718422013-04-28T06:33:21.556+01:002013-04-28T06:33:21.556+01:00John: I didn't known your mind was ON your ars...John: I didn't known your mind was ON your arse.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-84994924432463298802013-04-27T23:22:02.347+01:002013-04-27T23:22:02.347+01:00It would take my mind off my arseIt would take my mind off my arseJohn Going Gentlyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14958171262765033946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-2985959484439720042013-04-27T19:49:03.370+01:002013-04-27T19:49:03.370+01:00John: I thought your life was just one long crisis...John: I thought your life was just one long crisis - missing toilet rolls, faddy cats, squashed chickens, raging sciatica.... The last thing you need is a mid-life crisis on top of all that.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-12279772967244138282013-04-27T19:38:08.803+01:002013-04-27T19:38:08.803+01:00At 51
I know myself more than I ever have...... Am...At 51<br />I know myself more than I ever have...... Am I going though a crisis?<br />Naw..... But I would like to...it would make me more interestingJohn Going Gentlyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14958171262765033946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-24822060598581237812013-04-27T17:06:40.233+01:002013-04-27T17:06:40.233+01:00Ramana: I don't think unexpectedly leaving a s...Ramana: I don't think unexpectedly leaving a secure job counts as a mid-life crisis. Some lavish exaggeration there. And as you say, they all started doing the same a few months later.<br /><br />I don't like the term male menopause. It suggests some physiological change akin to women's and there's little evidence that's the case. Also it repeats the idea that it only happens in middle-age, when I think that sort of psychic crisis can happen at any age.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-35488016078637291702013-04-27T16:36:14.940+01:002013-04-27T16:36:14.940+01:00Incidentally, in some quarters it is also called t...Incidentally, in some quarters it is also called the male menopause!Rummuserhttp://www.rummuser.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-20036113211137151782013-04-27T16:34:25.134+01:002013-04-27T16:34:25.134+01:00Nick, it is all a matter of perceptive. When I wa...Nick, it is all a matter of perceptive. When I was 47, I had reached the top echelons in a multinational behemoth and was supposed to have been on the fast track for greater things. I had already put in 23 years with them, that is almost half my life then. Totally unexpected by them and all my colleagues and subordinates, I quit to move to an Indian company. Almost all friends and family said that it was my mid life crisis. Six months later the exodus started in the same company with the same guys who thought that I was nuts, also joining the exodus. I did not call it their mid life crisis, just delayed reaction to something that was obvious to me, but not to them. I reiterate, it is all a matter of perception and post event explanation.<br /><br />You are okay, nothing wrong with you for not having done anything as crazy as that. Rummuserhttp://www.rummuser.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-27117259451653396672013-04-27T08:57:16.398+01:002013-04-27T08:57:16.398+01:00And before anyone asks about me, I had my own quit...And before anyone asks about me, I had my own quite startling early-life crisis in my twenties, the repercussions of which are still with me. But that's very private and I'm not revealing any details....Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-72932189986371044222013-04-27T08:43:08.832+01:002013-04-27T08:43:08.832+01:00Leah: Some term like fulcrum point is probably bet...Leah: Some term like fulcrum point is probably better in that it recognises the crucial factor is psychic crisis rather than age.<br /><br />And yes, you're right, apart from Jay's "mad moment", nobody else here seems to have had such a psychic crisis - it's only happened to their friends and relatives! I find that a little hard to believe too. Maybe they're just too embarrassed to tell?<br /><br />Sure, people do things they've always wanted to do, or envy their younger selves, or just quietly take stock. But that doesn't necessarily lead to a full-blown personal crisis. That requires some extra factor, I think.<br /><br />I agree that it's most likely a crisis of transition, but I think as I said earlier it could be an attempt to jump the tracks altogether, to become a totally different person.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-78992218795437571582013-04-27T08:26:02.932+01:002013-04-27T08:26:02.932+01:00Agent: Good point that older men looking for young...Agent: Good point that older men looking for younger women is just unfair. It's amazing how many older men simply can't accept that the chance of a twenty-something fancying them (unless they're millionaires) is virtually zero.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-15461219394726142062013-04-27T08:16:31.128+01:002013-04-27T08:16:31.128+01:00www: A lot of this urge to reinvent oneself must b...www: A lot of this urge to reinvent oneself must be inspired by all the movie and media males with their jet-setting lifestyles and flashy accessories (like the bikes and the bling). I suspect not much of it is a genuine personal prompting.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-28151194680204184142013-04-27T06:16:04.156+01:002013-04-27T06:16:04.156+01:00P.s. Of course it is about transition.P.s. Of course it is about transition.Leahnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-9504563903411078832013-04-27T05:21:54.751+01:002013-04-27T05:21:54.751+01:00No offense to anyone, but really, I think there is...No offense to anyone, but really, I think there is a lot of oversimplifying going on here...Leahnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-32477441313156086692013-04-27T05:20:18.198+01:002013-04-27T05:20:18.198+01:00Oh, I guess I have a very different take on this. ...Oh, I guess I have a very different take on this. First off, it's women as much as men who go through this. My friend refuses to call it a "midlife crisis," and instead calls it a "fulcrum point" (which may be Jungian or something?)<br /><br />I think everyone must go through some version of this, even if they aren't doing the cheesy stereotypical sports car-younger-chick/dude thing (and honestly i don't see that so often). I bet quite often people don't even recognize it as a fulcrum point/midlife crisis. Are you really telling me that of all the people commenting here, almost no one has gone through the reassessing or taking stock that comes with the approach of middle age? or even done some things they thought they might not get the chance to do again? or looked back at their younger self in something like envy? tried to get at those young feelings again? Maybe even acted foolishly in the process?<br /><br />I simply don't believe it.<br /><br />The crisis of transition is healthy and normal.Leahhttp://theweatherinthestreets.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-59866199662681253172013-04-27T01:55:44.706+01:002013-04-27T01:55:44.706+01:00Oh it's definitely a real phenomenon and those...Oh it's definitely a real phenomenon and those guys are all over the dating sites. Older guys who have no concept that it isn't really fair that they are looking exclusively for younger women. I've had men significantly older than me contact me and then get all offended when I point out that they are too old for me! Fuckers.Secret Agent Womanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07564690116156754219noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-699449346235579732013-04-27T00:58:18.302+01:002013-04-27T00:58:18.302+01:00I can't count the times I've observed this...I can't count the times I've observed this Nick, including in my own family and among clients and friends. It's like the guy looks in the mirror one morning and spots the grey and the wrinkles and the station wagon outside and reinvents himself overnight and starts wearing silk shirts and *ugh* gold chains and studs in odd places and yes the sports car or heaven forbid the Harley and the tats.<br />Women too I hear get affected by this too but not in my circle.<br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-23420729416066474892013-04-26T19:47:28.827+01:002013-04-26T19:47:28.827+01:00Jay: Actually, I didn't know, what mad moment ...Jay: Actually, I didn't know, what mad moment was that? Good job you didn't have an affair, that really causes ructions. And you're right about the older man chasing a younger woman and becoming a figure of fun. So often it all ends in tears as the younger woman buggers off and his wife won't take him back because she's greatly enjoying life without him!Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-81367325209863547852013-04-26T18:22:28.658+01:002013-04-26T18:22:28.658+01:00Ah, well, um. Well. As you know, I had my mad &#...Ah, well, um. Well. As you know, I had my mad 'moment' which lasted a few years - and boy, was it fun! <br /><br />I didn't, however have an affair, or do anything to upset my lovely family. On the contrary, they seemed to enjoy it as much as me!<br /><br />I don't get the going off with a younger woman/man thing. I really don't. I doesn't prolong youth, it just makes you a bit of a figure of fun among your own age group, it seems to me.<br /><br />'Course, if Johnny Depp had actually been <i>interested</i> ... ;)Jay at The Depp Effecthttp://www.thedeppeffect.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-80723578615780915782013-04-26T13:47:59.032+01:002013-04-26T13:47:59.032+01:00Bonsaimum: Indeed, trying to turn the clock back i...Bonsaimum: Indeed, trying to turn the clock back is just embarrassing for the person concerned and all those around him. Of course it's also about trying to be trendy and up-to-the-minute.<br /><br />Jenny: I think this isn't so much about transition as trying to jump the tracks altogether and pretend you have a totally different kind of life.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-89308815880509917362013-04-26T13:35:53.571+01:002013-04-26T13:35:53.571+01:00I think that sometimes it can be very hard to make...I think that sometimes it can be very hard to make the transition from one stage of life to the next - the worst probably being from babyhood to childhood and from childhood to adulthood. Although the final one isn't much fun either come to think of it. Jenny Woolfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16881781466502273314noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-21448996915534766342013-04-26T11:54:44.169+01:002013-04-26T11:54:44.169+01:00Unfortunately I do know a few people who did the w...Unfortunately I do know a few people who did the whole mid-life crisis thing. Nothing worse than a middle aged man trying to be 20 again.bonsaimumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07684530085331629758noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-4573224759906733602013-04-26T07:40:57.918+01:002013-04-26T07:40:57.918+01:00Monk: The most exciting job of your life? Tell me ...Monk: The most exciting job of your life? Tell me more, I don't think I ever heard about that!Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-68099114247616121642013-04-26T04:29:25.201+01:002013-04-26T04:29:25.201+01:00I'm afraid I'm well past that age now, but...I'm afraid I'm well past that age now, but my life did change quite a bit then --- ended up getting the most exciting job of my life. Work can be fun too! Still having it. Cheerful Monkhttp://cheerfulmonk.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-50240543666020864012013-04-25T23:08:20.664+01:002013-04-25T23:08:20.664+01:00Grannymar: What dull and dreary little lives?
Bij...Grannymar: What dull and dreary little lives?<br /><br />Bijoux: Sorry to hear that. It sounds as if it was all a very painful business.<br /><br />Z: Oh, that seems to contradict what Bijoux is saying. And did their partners also come through it okay, or were they knocked for six?Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-62106992997925660082013-04-25T22:39:23.142+01:002013-04-25T22:39:23.142+01:00I've known a few too, men and women. Most of ...I've known a few too, men and women. Most of them have come through it okay.Zhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00822383355869390919noreply@blogger.com