tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post6889030228894543916..comments2024-03-28T07:49:04.960+00:00Comments on nickhereandnow: A lack of trustnickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10472673041193755894noreply@blogger.comBlogger23125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-66189254889091870812013-04-21T11:33:49.055+01:002013-04-21T11:33:49.055+01:00Jay: True, mixing with so many people from differe...Jay: True, mixing with so many people from different cultural backgrounds can be difficult and confusing. The point you make about being told off is a good example. We assume other people follow the same rules as us and can be quite thrown when they do something totally different.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-45277767197626012752013-04-21T10:05:49.778+01:002013-04-21T10:05:49.778+01:00Just catching up here, after being away!
I didn&#...Just catching up here, after being away!<br /><br />I didn't mean that the immigrants themselves caused the problem by being impolite... I think it's mostly to do with being forced into close proximity with a lot of different cultures - we simply don't know the rules, and yet we still have to interact. <br /><br />I remember hearing from a teacher that one reason that some immigrant youths get into trouble in US schools can be that they are taught that it's impolite to look at the person who is telling you off about something and yet the teachers feel it's a sign of disrespect NOT to do so.Jay at The Depp Effecthttp://www.thedeppeffect.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-12315015418925198862013-04-04T15:11:28.357+01:002013-04-04T15:11:28.357+01:00Ramana: I'm glad to know you're an open bo...Ramana: I'm glad to know you're an open book! And no extra pages hidden away in the cellar....Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-86775474130169103752013-04-04T14:44:22.667+01:002013-04-04T14:44:22.667+01:00In my case, what you see and what you hear is what...In my case, what you see and what you hear is what you get. I have no hidden agendas. I trust till I am proved otherwise.Rummuserhttp://www.rummuser.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-42613672668311177342013-04-04T10:06:40.772+01:002013-04-04T10:06:40.772+01:00Bonsaimum: Everyone else thinking they can run you...Bonsaimum: Everyone else thinking they can run your lives? That's not good. Yes, I find that's often true that disagreement leads to enemy status! Is there nothing in between friendly and daggers-drawn?Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-78407451614832281532013-04-04T08:56:55.884+01:002013-04-04T08:56:55.884+01:00Know exactly how you feel. Hubby and I are very pr...Know exactly how you feel. Hubby and I are very private probably from having to put up with everyone else thinking they can run our lives. Also it seems that if you don't agree with someone, you must be their enemy. The concept of rational discussion seems to have gone the way of the Dinosaurs.bonsaimumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07684530085331629758noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-18111923878222216962013-04-03T19:24:06.124+01:002013-04-03T19:24:06.124+01:00Eryl: That's remarkably open of you. Clearly t...Eryl: That's remarkably open of you. Clearly there's nothing about yourself that you find too embarrassing or private to mention. And presumably you get a sympathetic hearing from those you're confiding in.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-24534091158332303272013-04-03T18:41:23.801+01:002013-04-03T18:41:23.801+01:00I must be frightfully boring because I can think o...I must be frightfully boring because I can think of nothing I couldn't tell about myself to even the meanest, most manipulative of people. I must create a dark, inner life. Erylhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06008344023000459577noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-53603942648731173192013-04-03T11:21:57.611+01:002013-04-03T11:21:57.611+01:00Scarlet: According to Google, it was a plug for a ...Scarlet: According to Google, it was a plug for a Russian free-movies website. But I always delete the anonymous messages, so it's now gone.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-34315531960535770342013-04-03T10:06:36.548+01:002013-04-03T10:06:36.548+01:00I've google translated Anon's comment... h...I've google translated Anon's comment... he's certainly letting it all hang out!<br />SxMs Scarlethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00449626572478125088noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-20229457931952312062013-04-02T22:13:49.710+01:002013-04-02T22:13:49.710+01:00Grannymar: Of course you have, but you keep it to ...Grannymar: Of course you have, but you keep it to yourself!<br /><br />Jay: Probably sensible to be so secretive. As you say, you're talking to a bunch of strangers who may not have your best interests at heart.<br /><br />It's not a need for privacy so much as a lack of trust in others. But yes, I agree politeness can be a form of self-preservation in a crowded world. I don't think the decline in politeness has anything to do with immigrants though. In fact a lot of immigrants are far more polite than the natives!Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-51886382035240391902013-04-02T20:04:32.363+01:002013-04-02T20:04:32.363+01:00I'm just a tad paranoid online. I don't u...I'm just a tad paranoid online. I don't use my real name - well hardly at all - and I never post personal details. My Facebook settings are all 'no, no, no, no'. Do not allow this, that, or the other. My address there is merely the nearest big city. <br /><br />Part of me realises that it's mildly paranoid, but the other part (the bigger part) realises that you simply can't trust a bunch of total strangers because some people are just ... not normal.<br /><br />I wouldn't feel too bad about your own need for privacy. Look at it this way: the more cramped our society becomes, the more important it is to be polite, OR limit other people's access to us. It's simple self-preservation, and it's universal. Why do you think the Japanese are so polite? In a cultural sense it is absolutely necessary to have evolved that way or they'd probably all go nuts. We used to be ultra-polite in the UK for much the same reason (high population, small space) but then we had a huge influx of immigrants. I think that's where it all started to go wrong.Jay at The Depp Effecthttp://www.thedeppeffect.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-21947846656044391962013-04-02T19:05:49.061+01:002013-04-02T19:05:49.061+01:00Sometimes I wonder if I have a soul to bare. Maybe...Sometimes I wonder if I have a soul to bare. Maybe you can tell me next time we meet up for coffee.Grannymarhttp://grannymar.com/blognoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-20896445834663264332013-04-02T17:06:34.049+01:002013-04-02T17:06:34.049+01:00Bijoux: Perhaps politicians and journalists are mo...Bijoux: Perhaps politicians and journalists are more tolerant where you are, but the sneering and sniping that goes on over here is mind-boggling. And that's probably to cover up the fact that they're scared, as you suggest.<br /><br />www: I think reflective souls are thin on the ground everywhere. A lot of people resort to instant opinions rather than take the time to think something through properly.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-47351430301357851932013-04-02T15:19:37.428+01:002013-04-02T15:19:37.428+01:00I was reflecting on this very same thing recently ...I was reflecting on this very same thing recently Nick.<br /><br />Out here at the Edge I've learned to be extremely careful as the gossip mill can be quite damaging. We all long to be understood but we have to be so careful who we select.<br /><br />I am most comfortable with reflective souls but they are unfortunately quite thin on the ground here.<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-50237420841514515302013-04-02T14:59:48.199+01:002013-04-02T14:59:48.199+01:00I'm not sure I agree that we are encouraged to...I'm not sure I agree that we are encouraged to sneer at what we dont understand. I think that's just what mean or ignorant people like to do. Or I think people are just scared of what they don't understand, so they may react in a negative manner. I've never felt that modern day society encourages negative behavior.Bijouxhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05788630004051883635noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-34454449757661170012013-04-02T07:40:36.891+01:002013-04-02T07:40:36.891+01:00Agent: Spilling one's guts just anywhere would...Agent: Spilling one's guts just anywhere would certainly be asking for trouble. And yes, of course you have your particular work to think of.<br /><br />e: Indeed, the gossip mill. Even people you think of as discreet can still be tempted to gossip....Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-1447206910377050962013-04-02T00:10:25.684+01:002013-04-02T00:10:25.684+01:00I have never been one to bare my soul in a hurry, ...I have never been one to bare my soul in a hurry, either...too afraid of the gossip mill.ehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11376645220662546020noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-61680602611055341342013-04-01T23:19:18.506+01:002013-04-01T23:19:18.506+01:00I am fairly trusting in general, although I don...I am fairly trusting in general, although I don't go around spilling my guts just anywhere. In large part because it could be damaging to my career! But with friends, talking intimately comes easily to me.Secret Agent Womanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07564690116156754219noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-17309024861516655452013-04-01T22:03:05.740+01:002013-04-01T22:03:05.740+01:00John: I do, don't I? That's because I trus...John: I do, don't I? That's because I trust you guys with what I tell you. Mind you, like Liz says, there are other deeper things that I still keep strictly to myself....Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-47314667608140744752013-04-01T21:48:40.943+01:002013-04-01T21:48:40.943+01:00I do not bare my soul ......
You do here!I do not bare my soul ......<br /><br />You do here!John Going Gentlyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14958171262765033946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-71854671407890679082013-04-01T20:54:31.715+01:002013-04-01T20:54:31.715+01:00Liz: This is the clever thing, we're all good ...Liz: This is the clever thing, we're all good at feigning openness and frankness, while keeping our deepest self well away from the public gaze. The tip of the iceberg as it were....<br /><br />Yes, I also tend to believe what others tell me, unless alerted otherwise.Nicknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3467242994126386706.post-85745397370235976782013-04-01T20:49:38.788+01:002013-04-01T20:49:38.788+01:00Nor me. I keep well hidden - even though I sometim...Nor me. I keep well hidden - even though I sometimes seem to reveal a lot on my blog the real me is carefully concealed.<br /><br />On the other hand i do trust easily in that i believe what anyone tells me. I assume they will be honest as i am.<br /><br />Liz Hindshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04646532093872561703noreply@blogger.com